recovery...a dream deferred

*Snif

I'm at home, not quite sick, but aware that there are tiny microscopic organisms staging an all out war on my cells...I always win though, this year more than others. My awesome doc tells me that the measure of your health is your ability to get over a cold...when you stop "recovering" then we have a problem....

*clear throat

Well now, recovery....
May I make a stretch of a connection, can you bear with me?

I am not recovering.

Last week I had cornel west standing next to me with his arms around my shoulders telling me to hold on and keep planting seeds - thats the work we do. Not changing people, but planting seeds...

Intellectually I get it, I know you know that, I've said it before...

But I end up trying to convince people to have compassion, to not call her a whore, to care about the poor... I don't mean some abstract 'what would jesus do' moment... but don't shut down Ms. X case for no reason (she won't receive her food stamps).... Don't kick Mr. X out of the program because you think he is dangerous (he will violate his parole)... Dont lie to Ms. Y, there are other things she can do besides maintenance work...

Oh and then to watch C-span and see Mr. Limbaugh say, upon reflection no less, that he hopes the president fails... We knew this was coming, that their very ideology demands that Obama fail in his efforts of equality...should he even remotely succeed it would mean the utter destruction of his base...

You know what? 52% of the voting public voted for Obama, I take that to mean that about 52% of people are standing up for right, are sane, don't believe that our president is a Marxist, a socialist, and isn't a citizen...

But that means that 48% of people are not standing up for right. They look at the choices and choose to follow Rush Limbaugh?!? That is a whole lot of seeds to plant...

and at this point I'm tired of trying to convince people to embrace compassion on a micro and a macro level. Do you know what it feels like to discover how many of those seeds need to be planted in your backyard...your own..house? I preferr to sit here in the dark on the couch watching Family court...well, right now its Ellen - watching her show is like being in the movie Charlie and the Chocolate Factory without all the didactic violence against the children...

Maybe I will recover tomorrow - uhm will someone check on me?!

I'm pissed off vol.1

1) I am pissed that people are criticising Obama...haha...for using Washington insiders in his cabinet. First; every Washington democrat has worked or somehow been affiliated with the Clintons period! There is a difference between having 'worked' for them and being a Clintonian duh! AND, working presently for a government institution, you don't get ANYTHING done without insiders, as much as you would like to dream it can be done another way; you just make those fat cats work for you - - it is possible... (forgive the grammer - I'm going all post-modern grammer today)

2) I am tired of people assuming they know what Black Feminists professed to believe or work that we have accomplished without ever having READ a frickin book by a black feminist. It is the absolute height of ignorance - like - could you be more Sarah Palin?

Its so dark and peaceful down here...

I'm still posting from my ostrich hole of denial but I wanted to point out how the mainstream press has FINALLY over the past week acknowledged that they too are concerned with the rabid race baiting of the McCain/Palin campaign (check out my previous blog which mentioned it waaaaaayyyy before those overpaid, successful, not in debt - never mind you know what I mean..anyway before those folks noticed it).

I just wanted to add and say that after careful consideration of the issues that I have been thinking about lately, especially of all the political things that have been revealed in the past week,

I don't give a dam.

About any of it. I registered to vote - so what. Obama isn't going to change anything. McCain, should he win, I suspect will fuck u further BUT, and here is the bright side, either way I still have to pay my student loans for the rest of my life. The whole end of it, whatever is left, even the tiny crumbs at the bottom of the bag - it belongs to citibank. Economy tanks, gotta pay my loans. Economy fixes itself, gotta pay my loans. I marry rich and have beautiful children, still...gotta pay my loans. Do you see a pattern here? I should sing it, add a hook, a video with naked girls and then maybe my life will mean something...and all before the age of 30.

I should just die. That would teach 'em. Come get this money now! I mean, I could just see myself looking up at those bastards from my grave like, "ha, who's winning now...shit faces..."

Ayers who?

I would get into it but instead will post a for more interesting article...

The New Republic article reports:

It would have far more factual validity for Obama, or a surrogate, to publicize the fact that Track, the kid who joined the Army, did so because a judge told him it was that or jail due to his dealing drugs. I have a strong hunch, however, the Obama people would never get into that. Up until now the lady has annoyed me because of her ignorance and arrogance, but now I am furious, especially when her headline-making remark from yesterday was that Obama was not "fit" to be commander-in chief. I think the McCain people better lock the lady up again and tell her to zip it, because she is not fit to even ad-lib.

http://blogs.tnr.com/tnr/blogs/the_spine/archive/2008/10/05/margo-howard-palin-should-zip-it.aspx

I really am speechless. One kid is a single parent and other a drug dealer?! Really, I just have nothing to say right now.

Obama waffles

So have you seen this one? I wanted to just say "enough said" and go watch 'The Biggest Loser', but it isn't enough. I can't say enough about the fact that we are a racist country.

When interviewed, the inventors of this product noted that it was not meant to be racist - they simply thought it was a great way to play up the fact that Obama changes his stance on different policies - his 'waffling'. They even pointed out that they 'loved' Aunt Jemima pancakes and thus it was a compliment to place his face on the box - I suppose the reason why Republicans 'believe' obvious lies, that keep getting repeated until they become truth, is because they do the same thing in their daily lives! - a fucking compliment...they weren't even cracking a smile when they said it.

Never mind that you can't see the caricature of Michelle on the other side, never mind the demeaning history of Aunt Jemima and the obvious cooning highlighted with those pictures, never mind the fact that they enlarged his lips and made them shiny, never mind the insensitivity of using a painful memory of an entire portion of the united states as humor - this is a painful dehumanizing mockery of a man who deserves to be respected. To make history in the way he has, to fundamentally change the way people will campaign for the highest office in our nation forever, to come from a group of people who remain marginalized and discriminated against, means that he gets placed in a category of veneration.

The need and desire to tear this man down, to denigrate him in this fashion truly comes from a vicious spirit - a spirit that needs to believe in the portrait painted on the side of that box. There is an identity whose existence requires that people of color remain that caricature and not the President of the United States of America. What would these racist do, in their small towns (although don't think for a moment that I don't know they are on the train with me, chilling in Saks with me, getting an 8$ latte with me), if they had to face the reality of black intelligence, of black humanity?!? That's the real fight here, and that explains the true source of the viciousness in this campaign - it is a fight for ones identity, the ability of one to continue to say that old joke... no matter, at least I'm not a nigger.

Update: In case you didn't see it coming - Stacy and Adam - the green team A.K.A the black team got voted off the first episode.... because they were the 'strongest'...aka...whatever, i'm going to bed...